Andrew "Zap" Zappala
---------------- Class of 2008 ----------------


Number: 26

Position: Middle

Height: 5'8"

Hometown: Westford, MA

Member of: B-Men 2005-2006, E-Men 2007-2008

Current Info:

Biography
From 1996 to 1999, Andrew Zappala was the head mattress-tester for Sealy Posturepedic. After he was caught skimming off some of the mattress springs and selling them on the black market, he was forced to resign his position and leave the country. He attended high school on a Norwegian cruise ship, where he worked as a swimming instructor and "that guy who fetches stuff that's fallen into crawlspaces." Then, before applying to college, he took a year off to pursue his snow angel art, earning several awards and a solo exhibition at the MoMA. This history, plus a couple more items not mentionable in a PG-13 bio, adds up to one thing: having spent more than half of his waking life in the horizontal position, Andrew Zappala sure as hell knows how to lay out. That expertise, combined with his exceptional quickness and winning enthusiasm, promises to make Zap a star player in 2007, his first season with the E-Men.

By night, Andrew Zappala is known to play to the crowd at parties with his boy-band-caliber dance moves and encyclopedic knowledge of 2pac lyrics. His hobbies include running for ya jewels, busting at them fools, and hairstyling. Women are lucky if they can hold on to this shimmying stud for very long, but his relationship with his hetero lifemate, Howard, is unshakable. All in all, Zap reminds us of that old adage: "In the land of the eunuch, the one-testicled man is king."